I was out and away from my laptop for seven and a half hours yesterday. I get home and it’s just … bleh. Cannot get the creativity flowing. Really starting to have the critic creep up on me, and it’s hard to persevere.
Mostly because last night was, the husband and I agreed, one of those nights where someone has done something amAzinG and sPectaCular. One of those nights where everyone glosses over you and spends the next seven hours on said someone. It’s not exactly good for the soul. I mean, I was extremely proud and got all my questions answered from said someone, but when that kind of turns into the entire night’s focus, and all me and the husband get are nods of just being, it lowers self esteem.
Makes you feel bad about a job you know you rock at.
Makes you feel bad about not jetting off to places, even though you could never afford to do that.
Makes you feel bad about picking a honeymoon destination that no one else really liked, even though it wasn’t their vacation to pick.
Makes you want to blurt things out about writing when you know it’s not worth it to say anything.
Nights like last night are few and far between, but they happen to all of us. You feel deeply inadequate and you want to shout out that I AM ACHIEVING SOMETHING BESIDES THIS HAIRCUT, I SWEAR!
Speaking of which someone, not any someone last night, but someone had such a positive and uplifting response to my haircut that I had an incredible dream about them and now have an idea for next writing adventure.
Just as soon as I finish this paIn in the asS.